Updates

Little Sister

After three months of Buffy, chocolate, beach visits, pizza and one-sided conversations, I think I’ve finally broken the ice with Katy. I got my first hug after we both almost contracted hypothermia from a late evening swim, and I tell you what, my smugness and self-satisfaction would have reverberated into space that day.

It’s been challenging, but I’m enjoying what I’m learning. She’s a headstrong little thing, so I’m gradually figuring out how to avoid being bulldozed, and say “no” without sounding like a jerk. I probably let her get her own way a little too often, but that means we both have something to work on.

Bunny

The internet told me rabbits love to play. Your bunny will love to play in cardboard boxes! Your bunny will delight in shredding phone books! Your bunny will need things to chew on and stimulate her mind!

So I went ahead and collected cardboard boxes, seagrass toys, wicker baskets, phone books, fluffy toys, balls and newspapers. My bunny will be the happiest bunny ever! She will frolic while I delight in her goofy antics!

Not so. I might as well have bought her a book of Sudoku puzzles or a Rubik’s cube. Roman’s only interests are confined to dinner (hers, mine or the cat’s – makes no difference), the cat, sniffing things on the floor and lying down. Occasionally she’ll tear down the hallway like a cheetah, which she can apparently accomplish without the aid of a $25 Fiddlesticks chewable tunnel. Ungrateful vermin. 

Here she is after learning to climb the furniture and devour my succulents:

I didn't plant that.

Oh, what? Like you've never had a binge you judgemental bitch.

 

Tough Mudder

Eight days to go! The training has been SO much fun, and I’m fitter than I’ve ever been. Although you’d never tell by looking at me. It seems I’ve mastered the esoteric skill of gaining muscle without losing fat – five months of hill climbs, jumping lunges and squats have resulted in my arse now having its own post code. It’s annoying that my pants no longer fit, but once Tough Mudder is over I’ll aim for a bit of fat loss, but try to keep my epic guns.

Why yes I am awesome, thanks for noticing.

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21 thoughts on “Updates

  1. Yay!! You look spectacular! Don’t be discouraged by the weight, muscle mass will do that to you (so will the workout clothing sadly). It’s temporary and anyway I think you look extremely fit.

    Great news about Katy, I’m sure it is a process for everyone. Pizza, swimming, the beach? That sounds good to me! Roman seems to not appreciate the finer things in life, but that’s her job. To make you crazy. Trust me after having cats this long, we know they live to remind us we’re humans, whereas they are gods and goddesses. 😉

    • Hah, cheers Amelie! I hope I lose it before it turns into long-pants weather – I can’t button up ANYTHING. I feel pretty good though, so that’s what counts, right? Right?!

      Romy certainly lacks class, but then so does her owner sometimes 😉 I’ve always resisted getting a dog on my own because they are quite high maintenance – but at least they don’t have the god complex!

      • I can’t button up my damned shorts either, and the scale has said some mean things to me this month. But as long as you’re ready a handful of extra pounds means nothing.

        I love me my cats. Dogs don’t really do it for me. All that drooling. I’d rather get attitude.

  2. You do look great! How fun to be doing a mudder of a race, harhar.
    I am hoping that with spring here I will lose some of my extra flab…belly flab that is, and get into better shape. I guess I had better do more than hope! 😛

    Critters are who they are, just like us, and learning to respect them is a great thing.
    Also, with Katy, the progress is fantastic! You have a right to that feeling of accomplishment!

    Orion is definitely a huge dawg. Huge head, huge jowls, big drools. Compared to him Calli was a dainty 150 pounds!
    Still, I love my dawgs, drool and all. They are definitely high maintenance!

    • Aww get out there and enjoy your spring Lauri! A daily romp with Orion and you’ll be a sports star in no time. The days are getting cooler over here, which is a tad depressing.

      I’ll get myself a dawg when I’m finally living in the country. You know, in 36 years or so.

  3. Congratulations on the training, you’re looking marvellous. I’ve had the same problem, I’ve been training and my legs, which were already reasonably shaped, have grown some impressive new muscles, however no matter what I try, I still have arms like a fucking chicken. I think I must be genetically programmed to have pipecleaners for arms. Sigh. Keep up the good work.
    We bought our dog a shedload of expensive and impressive looking toys when we got him. He ignored all of these in favour of trashing cheap plastic plant pots in the garden. The moral of the story is that animals are ungrateful buggers who will make their own entertainment just to piss you off.

    • Yeah, I’m a victim of chronic chickenarm too. Get the protein shakes into you, that helped me a bit.

      I think the whole pet industry must be fraudulent. Critters don’t need chew toys and fluffy beds – my cat sleeps on my shoes and bunny is entertained by my foot.

  4. LMAO. As one who has a yard full of fucking chickens (literally…the poor hens run screaming when they see a rooster) I had to laugh at your arm description.

    Still laughing at Roman calling you a “judgemental bitch”, too.

  5. Bunnies are like cats. The cats who play with the empty cigarette box, not the $25 battery powered mouse with remote control. (I did have one who played with it briefly after the batteries died) We have some who play with toys and some who do not. The cardboard is for chewing. Which she will do at 3 am and very loudly rip pieces off and make you think some gigantic human just crashed though the back door drunk or a new tectonic plate has been formed under your house, the first few times you hear it. Disdain is the word of the day with a bunny.

    • I’ve read a few stories on the internet about bunnies and their nocturnal adventures! Roman seems to sleep when I do, which I’m grateful for.

    • She showed absolutely zero interest in the phone book anyway…and everything else. Cardboard boxes don’t interest her, other than to sit on. She has a nice seagrass basket, and even as I type this she’s lying with her front paws in it looking at me. THAT COST ME TWELVE DOLLARS, CHEW THE BLOODY THING.

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